Dealing with difficult people can be, well simply put, Difficult. That’s a no brainer. There are about 7 billion people on this earth and guess what, not all of them are the easy going type who do whatever you ask with a smile on their face and pep in their step. You will find that the guy or gal who is skilled with dealing with these hard to work with types typically is more of a success in throughout their career and just a happier person in general.
The importance of Dealing with People, Become a Success and Be Happy!
I have been reading this book How to Have Confidence and Power in Dealing with People by Les Giblin, which I HIGHLY recommend to anyone who seeks further knowledge on becoming a better “people person.” On the first page of the book Giblin writes “Various scientific studies have proven that if you learn how to deal with other people, you will have gone about 85% of the way down the road to success in any business, occupation, or profession, and about 99% of the way down the road to person happiness.” Now if that doesn’t motivate you to develop some human relations skills then I have No Clue what will. I want to hit you with some more statistics, which I have gotten from this book and that is “The Carnegie Institute of Technology analyzed the records of 10,000 persons, and arrived at the conclusion that 15% of success is due to technical training, to brains and skill on the job, and 85% of success is due to personality factors, to the ability to deal with other people successfully!”
Arguing is Completely Pointless
I won’t bombard you with statistics, because hopefully by now you get the point that dealing with people is Insanely important to the development of you as a human being. I will however share with you some proven techniques to dealing with difficult people that I have learned. One type of person that is quite prevalent in our society is the argumentative person who feels they must beat down their opponent with verbal assaults. This can be frustrating to deal with, because sometimes you are just trying to have a regular conversation and the person you are speaking with tries to find some fault in what you said, or even worse something that has little to do with your main point. Often times they will assert themselves and correct you, which in turn causes some people to protect their pride (even if wrong) and feed the fire with a back and forth argument. A good quote that sums up the ineffectiveness of this route is “Win the Argument Lose the Sale.” Whether or not you are actually selling something is irrelevant, because the fact remains that your message will be completely ignored (whether you were right or wrong) simply because you hurt the other person’s ego. We as human beings have a desire to feel important and we also naturally occasionally doubt ourselves. “Beating” someone in a verbal confrontation makes them feel less “worthy” and will make them doubt themselves even more. How do you think this person will feel towards you if you caused this emotional strain? You guessed it, they Probably Won’t like you. You succeeded in feeding your own ego but at what expense? Do you really want to be the person who goes around and makes people think less of themselves?